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Domestic Violence Escalation in Corona Crisis

What Are The Domestic Violence Fears and Insecurities?

Covid-19 is a global pandemic , but we have another hidden menace on our planet.There are increasing incidents of domestic violence and related abuses.The fears and insecurities are extreme and victims  safety has  been highly compromised

What is Domestic  Violence?It is acts and behaviors which are tyrannical and oppressive in nature.The Abuser desires to gain and maintain control ,over his or her  intimate partner with an intention to cause harm or death on their victim.It is repetitive in that abuse happens one day, followed by an apology ,a show of some kindness, like gifts and even some drama, “crocodile tears”. One day,week,or a month later,the cycle begins;another abuse usually worse than the first.The abuses also tend to escalate with additional different forms of abuse and occurring much more frequently.

  • Who is an intimate partner?-A current or former:
  • Marriage Partner.
  • Co-living  or “come-we stay together” partner.
  • Relatives living in the homestead.
  • Siblings living in the homestead.
  • Domestic help living in the homestead.
  • Dating partner.
  • Child-Witness to the domestic violence and/ or abuse.

Why has Domestic Violence Escalated with the corona crisis?

There are some common external factors used as an excuses to justify abusive behavior and actions during Corona times.The most common being stress ,financial strains, or being under the influence of alcohol, drugs or overheard gossip about their partner. During these lock down,isolation ,distancing and even curfew measures in some countries, abuser are playing an addictive game, using any tool to exert control over their victim. Added to this is the necessity of many companies encouraging employees to work remotely from home.This 24/7 close quartered is misused  by abusers in an already stressful situation to gain total control.

How do Abusers use Covid-19 times to abuse  their intimate partners?

  • An abusive partner in their narcissistic mind  feels justified to exercise total control over their intimate partner.What they do,whom they talk to ,how they work and nurture their children and prohibits them from free movement out of their sight.
  • An abuser uses the virus as a scare tactic to keep the survivor locked up and paranoid of any contact with anybody,especially family and friends.
  • Abusive partners may withhold necessary items such as hand sanitizer,disinfectants,or ask the victim to use large amounts of it causing rashes to their hands and arms.
  • An abusive partner may share misinformation about the pandemic, exagerating the deaths and infections in the nation and world at large.
  • There is a lot of verbal abuse and calling of names ,plus constant criticism.Nothing the partner says or does is pleasing in the eyes of the abuser.
  • The threats are usually followed by actions of choking, shoving ,beating and slapping
  • Television time is limited and there is household  chores overload  for the victim and no assistance from the partner who spends hours on the couch giving commands,watching television or on the mobile.
  • Abusive partners will withhold  insurance cards,threaten to cancel medical insurance,or prevent survivors from seeking appropriate medical attention if they have symptoms.
  • Help programs such as shelters for mothers and their children may be full,or may even stop intakes altogether.(The number of increasing cases is REAL!)
  • Victims phones are monitored.Online control and isolation is the first red flag of all abusers. Time checking even if one is at work or has just stepped outside to run some errands.All conversations on mobile phone must be on loud speaker and social media is a “No Go!”
  • Victims may also fear entering shelter or safe houses because of the close quarters with groups of people .
  • Victims who are older,or have  a chronic  ailment ,e.g heart or lung conditions,may be at increased risk in public places where they could typically get support like shelters,counseling centers or courthouses.
  • Travel restrictions during the pandemic times may hinder a survivor`s escape or safety plan.It might not be safe for them to fly or use public transport.
  • An abuser may even terrorize the victim to believing he/she has covid-19 in order to get 24/7 attention and extra food and care
  • The increased coercion in the bedroom maybe overbearing on the victim leading to rape and sexual abuse . (an  abuse which is a big topic on its own.)

WHAT A VICTIM MUST KNOW

  • You Do Not Deserve Any of This Violence or Abuse.Period!
  • You deserve to live without any violation on your dignity.
  • You are a child of the universe and there are many people ready to help you.
  • Domestic violence is real and you are not alone.  .
  • To be clear on what type of violence is happening to you read the articles.
  • Keep hotline numbers and closed family and friends hidden somewhere outside the house .
  • You do not have to be ashamed.
  • Please Create a Safety Plan-See Article”How to plan ahead”
  • Practice Self Care -See Article on Self Care & Mindfulness Article and other links
  • We are here to hold your hand and help you

REACH OUT FOR HELP

At the first given chance Call a friend or family member you trust and ask them to help you.

Call the police or helpline on your behalf.

Please ASK for Help! Many Volunteers are out there waiting for your call

Whatever area you live in there is a Hotline.

visit our face book page.Unmasking Domestic Violence (sms)

Tags:Abuse.Abuses.Domestic Violence Abuse .Help Lines.Isolation.Help.Domestic Violence Victims Shelters.Staying Safe.STaying  Safe during Covid-19

 

 

 

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Charity Wairimu Ngugi Latz

Human Dignity Visionary.Warrior & Domestic Violence Awareness Activist . Speaker. Migrant Issues Author .Community Reporter.You Tube Blogger .Volunteer as a Member Mentor in Germany with Kenya Women in Germany and HausAfrika and in Kenya with AmkaKaka Youth initiative Kawangware.

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